Lovie's Review
Title: " Lavender Love by Lovie "
URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/lavenderlove/
Reviewed by : Twilight_gal
Title:10%
It's a shortish title but speaks a lot about the story. Both characters inthis fanfiction love lavender hence making the title suitable.
Creativity of story: 16%
Well, its ordinary so far. Unless your going to add some spice into it, youwon't get very far. Repeat again, it's way over used.
Posters and bkgrd: 5%
There is no poster, but the bkgrd reminds one of lavenders. *smiles and nod*
Casts used: 4%
I don't know any of them.
Originality: 16%
Since the story hasn't been completed, I'm not sure about the ending, but sofar from what you've written, it's interesting. I have read many storieswith this plot. It's over used. Two people hate each other then they fall inlove.
Storyline plotting: 20%
It's neat and doesn't sound like you just wrote what came into your mind.Good!
Spelling Grammer: 3%
''Lara would want his dad to refuse to accept Ambrose as a heart surgeon,but unfortunately Ambrose was in favor of her dad and was the top student inthe university.
''I'm sure you mean ''her dad'' no?''WHATS UP THE PROBLEM WITH YOU? CANT YOU SEE THAT HEART MTTERS A LOT?''''...that the heart matters a lot?''
''He just could not believe that Ambrose would be as childish as herdaughter. ''''...as childish as his daughter.''
''The surgery started finally. Both Lara and Ambrose had the sterile clotheson, as the nurses and doctors in the room.''
''The surgery finally started. Both Lara and Ambrose had the same sterileclothes on as the nurses and doctors in the room.''
''It seems to work. But, she was afraid now that the foetus might not beable to breathe properly. She quickly cut the umbilical cord. There, theumbilical break loose the baby from the mother. She lifted the baby out ofthe womb and passed it to a nurse to be put into an incubator.''''She quickly cuts the umbilical cord. ...breaks loose from the babyand...
''Those are SOME mistakes I've found.
You need to make sure your tenses arecorrect and proof read your work before submitting.I have given you 3 because I feel that you've tried your best to produce thebest you have.
Overall enjoyment: 6%
Not completed, bring it up for reviewing once you've finished and maybeyou'll score a higher mark.
Comments: I think that this story is quite hard to put away and leave for arainy day, meaning its good, but the plot as I have stated twice above, is
the main reason you scored a 81%. I don't mean to burst your bubble, but
this plot is just so over used. If you complete it and review it again, Iassure you that you'll get higher considering this is not completed so Ijust gave you a overall from the 4 chapters you have written.
Hint: Don't use abb. Caps locks are a no. Use exclamation marks.
Total: 81 / 100
URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/lavenderlove/
Reviewed by : Twilight_gal
Title:10%
It's a shortish title but speaks a lot about the story. Both characters inthis fanfiction love lavender hence making the title suitable.
Creativity of story: 16%
Well, its ordinary so far. Unless your going to add some spice into it, youwon't get very far. Repeat again, it's way over used.
Posters and bkgrd: 5%
There is no poster, but the bkgrd reminds one of lavenders. *smiles and nod*
Casts used: 4%
I don't know any of them.
Originality: 16%
Since the story hasn't been completed, I'm not sure about the ending, but sofar from what you've written, it's interesting. I have read many storieswith this plot. It's over used. Two people hate each other then they fall inlove.
Storyline plotting: 20%
It's neat and doesn't sound like you just wrote what came into your mind.Good!
Spelling Grammer: 3%
''Lara would want his dad to refuse to accept Ambrose as a heart surgeon,but unfortunately Ambrose was in favor of her dad and was the top student inthe university.
''I'm sure you mean ''her dad'' no?''WHATS UP THE PROBLEM WITH YOU? CANT YOU SEE THAT HEART MTTERS A LOT?''''...that the heart matters a lot?''
''He just could not believe that Ambrose would be as childish as herdaughter. ''''...as childish as his daughter.''
''The surgery started finally. Both Lara and Ambrose had the sterile clotheson, as the nurses and doctors in the room.''
''The surgery finally started. Both Lara and Ambrose had the same sterileclothes on as the nurses and doctors in the room.''
''It seems to work. But, she was afraid now that the foetus might not beable to breathe properly. She quickly cut the umbilical cord. There, theumbilical break loose the baby from the mother. She lifted the baby out ofthe womb and passed it to a nurse to be put into an incubator.''''She quickly cuts the umbilical cord. ...breaks loose from the babyand...
''Those are SOME mistakes I've found.
You need to make sure your tenses arecorrect and proof read your work before submitting.I have given you 3 because I feel that you've tried your best to produce thebest you have.
Overall enjoyment: 6%
Not completed, bring it up for reviewing once you've finished and maybeyou'll score a higher mark.
Comments: I think that this story is quite hard to put away and leave for arainy day, meaning its good, but the plot as I have stated twice above, is
the main reason you scored a 81%. I don't mean to burst your bubble, but
this plot is just so over used. If you complete it and review it again, Iassure you that you'll get higher considering this is not completed so Ijust gave you a overall from the 4 chapters you have written.
Hint: Don't use abb. Caps locks are a no. Use exclamation marks.
Total: 81 / 100
posted by Viva - teamo at
1:07 AM
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